A Few Things

Recovery Meeting Last Night

I attended my recovery group meeting last night and it had been two weeks since I had last attended.  It was a good meeting, sharing and we are working on HOPE in our books.  We always open with a prayer and close with a prayer.  It wasn't as large a meeting last night as we have had before.  I usually love the meetings and it wasn't that I didn't love the meeting last night, but there was an awful lot of over talking last night.  We didn't even really get through the question we were working on in the book last night.  That is okay too!  I guess I was just needing more last night and I didn't get what I needed last night.  I know It's not all about me. 

I've not picked up my books for more than a month, until last night and we as a group are working on the first book.  I, as an individual, am working on the third book.  It may take me a long time to finish that book.  It deals with making amends, asking for forgiveness and confronting those that have hurt me.  This is a necessary step, but I'm not sure I can do it, and I know I definitely can't do it without Jesus Christ beside me. 

I still pray the prayers in the books about my hurts, hangups, habits and compulsive obsessive addictions.  I still pray for Jesus to take them, cure me, fix me and make me whole.  I love the joy in my heart, but my peace seems to be gone.  I prayed this morning for it to come back and be restored.  I know my Jesus will fix me, cure me and restore me.  My faith is such that I don't have to see to believe and I know He will fulfill my needs, desires and wants.  My God is Awesome, Strong, and He can set you free.  

We had revival this week with Dr. David Allen doing the services at night.  He gave us a powerful prayer to pray this week, and I will never stop.  I posted this under my status this morning on Facebook and will now share it here:  Jesus do anything in me that You need to do, in order to do everything through me You want to do.  Amen. 

Think about that sentence..  Then pray earnestly with a humble heart.  God will answer, but be prepared for the answer.  Love, L


People & Personalities

We as human beings, wear many different hats in our lives.  As a woman, I am a daughter, sister, mother, aunt, wife, daughter in law, cousin, and niece, but I also wear these hats, janitor, teacher, maid, bookkeeper, writer, student, landscaper, cook, trainer, laundress, friend, confidant, nurse, and I believe the list can go on forever.  The one title that is most important to me is Christian and Child of God. 

I realize that with each hat we wear, we can be a little different.  For the most part, I try to be the same person with all hats because the hat that I never take off is the one "Child of God."  Because of that hat, that is the person I want every one to see whether I am at church, praising God, at home, at the grocery store, cleaning, doing yard work or just living day to day.  I have a hard time understand why our personalities change because of what we are doing, or where we are working.  It doesn't make sense to me!  I know it happens, because when I was in Corporate America I was different than when I was at home.  But should we be?  Why is it necessary for us to be one person at church and another at home, or in the world?   

Any thoughts?  Comments?   Have a Blessed & God Filled Day!  Love, L.

My Beginning in Recovery

I went to my third meeting this week.  It is great to know that when you walk through the doors, no one cares if you are wearing brand name clothes, the latest in fashion, or even if you have your hair brushed or make up on.  You are accepted for exactly who you are... no strings, no expectations, just lots of hello, smiles, hugs, and I'm glad you made it.  A lot of the members of the group are way ahead of me.  I did get my books on Thursday and I got my T-shirt.  It is called Sink or Swim (SOS) and there is a bible scripture reference on the back.  In the group, one thing is for certain, no one would be there without God's help and without the desire to be healed.  Drugs, Alcohol, sex, food, and anything you can be an addict of, is just a band aid to cover up the hurt.  Peel off your band aids, and let the wounds heal!  I know that is what I'm trying to learn to do. 

Celebrate Recovery is a program based on the eight principles from the Beatitudes.  They are listed just inside the first book, along with the 12 steps.  I have just gotten to my first lesson, and the first question was and is extremely hard to answer. 

What was the question?  What areas of your life do you have power (control) over?  They want you to be specific.  It is a very difficult question to answer. 

Can you answer it??? 

May God Bless you Abundantly!  May you have a God Filled Day!

A conversation with God

I know you hear my thoughts and see what is in my heart. I know you hear my cries of pain, sadness, and anger. God it has been a truly weird week. Thank you for blessing me and my family. I thank you for the man I'm married to as it is without a doubt that you gave him to me. Thank you for my family, friends, and even those that are not close, but acquaintances, and some that are some times my enemies. Thank you for healing my best friend. I ask that you bless those that are in need. Answer the prayers of those that are ill, sick or need your help. Father, I ask for directions because it seems that I am fumbling in the darkness. I ask for strength to beat my demons and banish them forever. I ask that you answer the prayers of my sisters and help them to achieve their goals and wishes and support their families. I ask that you bless all my family, blood relatives, and my family by marriage. Father heal those that are sick and too weak to make it day to day. Father thank you for your son, who died so that I might live. Father I ask for wisdom and knowledge to do what I must and to handle the things that you leave for me to deal with. Father I give you all my needs, desires and wishes. Father I know that you will provide for us what we need when we need it. Father, I ask for wisdom for my sisters, mother, father, in laws, out laws, and all in between that they will do your will. Father please help those with addictions to fight their battles. Give them strength to make it through. Father, I ask a special blessing for my daughter and son in law, that they will have a closer walk with you. Father I ask you to bless them with a family. Father I know that I don't always do what you would have me to and I know that I sin. Father please forgive me for those sins of doubt, fear, hatred, anger and all those that I don't realize I have committed. Father I ask that you show me where I need to be, and what I need to do. Help me to understand your word as I read. Show me, help me, and heal me and most of all, Father continue to love me. I know that none of us are perfect and as hard as we try we cannot live your perfect will. We try but we all fall short. Help me Father to be a better person, more forgiving. Help me to get pass worrying about what others think of me. I know that all that matters is what is in my heart, and what you see in my heart. Father I ask that you give wisdom and knowledge to this world's leaders that they will make the right decisions. Father protect us all from false prophets and false teachers. I ask this in the name of the Father, the Son and The Holy Ghost. Amen.

God's Message Today

I've not been up long this morning and it was a very long and sleepless night last night. My best friend is sick and I don't know what to do for her. Dixie, my cockerbeagle stopped eating Sunday night and threw up a couple of times last night and has been running in and out of the doggie door with stomach problems. Her stomach was cramping last night. I gave her Pepto twice yesterday and some pain reliever last night. She slept outside most of the night and that is not something she ever does. She is not a young dog. I've had her for almost 10 years and we have been through some rough times. The thought that I might lose her is upper most in my mind and has been since late last night. I will be taking her to the vet today, this morning as soon as I can get in. On top of this, we have no work, so no money is coming in. So my stress level is very high. I pray every day and sometimes four or five times a day. Maybe not a prayer that is 5 or 6 minutes long. It may just be words like "Thank You God", "Help me Lord", "I love you God", or "Show me God", or lately, "Help me to Understand God." Sometimes when we think all is lost, and there is no hope, we forget to go to God. Sometimes we think we are too insignificant to really matter. Or maybe we think we are being punished for something we did or didn't do. My devotional today was a message from God, directed to my insecure feelings. The message came from Acts 9:11, it ends with "Behold, he is praying." Simply said, direct. The message said that even if the words are unable to be spoken, and only tears and sighs can be uttered, that God knows what we need and that heavens sings with music. Our tears are caught by God, and He loves that we have come to him for help. Remember that prayer is a very strong tool and can get us through the darkest times. We don't have to say anything for God to hear our cries and pain. We just have to bow in prayer. I have done this at least twice this morning already, and know without a doubt that it will not be the last time today that I go to God. Talk to God. Tell him your needs. Ask for His help. May God Bless You all today. Love, L. Read Pslam 56:8

Yesterday's Post - Help

I posted a blog yesterday and after much opposition, I deleted it today and now have regrets. Someone pointed out to me that, what God laid on my heart might help one person and that I should not stop just because I've hurt some people's feelings. SO anyone that received that blog by email, if you would forward it back to me, I would appreciate it. May God Bless you.. L