My journey through recovery

Tomorrow will be my 5th meeting with the Celebrate Recovery group at my church.  I still very unsure in the meetings, not because anyone has said anything to me, it is actually quite the opposite.  Everyone is very friendly, sharing, positive, and caring.  That scares me!  I have an issue with trust.  I'm afraid to bare my soul to people.  I told the leader last week, that I will never be able to get up in front of the group.  He said that was okay, that we would be back to two smaller groups in a week.  I think that time is tomorrow.  I completed the first two lessons on the first principle/step 1.

Principle 1:  Realize I'm not God.  I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and that my life is unmanageable.  Scripture:  Matthew 5:3  Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor.

Step 1:  We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.  Scripture:  Romans 7:18 I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.  For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.

As I worked through this principle/step 1 there were two lessons.  I was able to sit, think and be honest with my answers.  However when I got to the next to the last question in lesson 2 I stumbled.  I was unsure how to answer the question.  Now some people are going to read this and go "well here's some areas I can think of where this would apply."  My husband is bias and so he can't really help me on this one.  But here is the question:

Selfishness is at the heart of most problems between people.  In what areas of your life have you been selfish?

Can you answer this question honestly?  What would other people say?  What would your family answer on your behalf? 

I did write my answer down.  I felt I was honest with myself, but I'm not sure other people would agree. 

May you have a God Filled Day and Life. 
L

P.S. My husband who says he doesn't need the group, but goes to support me, stood in front of the group and shared some things with them last week....GOD is so Awesome!!!

My blogs

This is a notice just to let you know I'm removing automatic mailings of my blogs to email addresses.  If you want to continue to read it, you will need to sign up to follow the blog.  I'm not doing this to hurt anyone's feelings or because I'm mad at anyone... (Isn't it sad that I have to add this disclaimer)..  Anyway, I'm going through recovery and I'm writing to work through my emotions and to over come the past hurts and my addictions or former addictions... However once an addict always an addict, just sober or clean..   I don't wish illwill on anyone, and I don't wish to hurt anyone's feelings, but some of my remarks might.  I'd rather be safe than have to be sorry for something that was intentional...

May God bless you!

My Beginning in Recovery

I went to my third meeting this week.  It is great to know that when you walk through the doors, no one cares if you are wearing brand name clothes, the latest in fashion, or even if you have your hair brushed or make up on.  You are accepted for exactly who you are... no strings, no expectations, just lots of hello, smiles, hugs, and I'm glad you made it.  A lot of the members of the group are way ahead of me.  I did get my books on Thursday and I got my T-shirt.  It is called Sink or Swim (SOS) and there is a bible scripture reference on the back.  In the group, one thing is for certain, no one would be there without God's help and without the desire to be healed.  Drugs, Alcohol, sex, food, and anything you can be an addict of, is just a band aid to cover up the hurt.  Peel off your band aids, and let the wounds heal!  I know that is what I'm trying to learn to do. 

Celebrate Recovery is a program based on the eight principles from the Beatitudes.  They are listed just inside the first book, along with the 12 steps.  I have just gotten to my first lesson, and the first question was and is extremely hard to answer. 

What was the question?  What areas of your life do you have power (control) over?  They want you to be specific.  It is a very difficult question to answer. 

Can you answer it??? 

May God Bless you Abundantly!  May you have a God Filled Day!